WTF

Last week was, by far, the worst one I have had on plan. I ate like crap, didn't drink my water, didn't exercise. I only had 7 weekly points left over. Didn't earn a single activity point. As I posted before I started eating Halloween candy and just couldn't stop. One piece led to 20 pieces. Thank goodness John took the leftovers to work and let the firefighters eat 'em.

I figured that I would be lucky just to stay the same and not gain. I was so down on myself and feeling guilty. And, for the first time since starting my WW journey (homage to Kourtney, our fearless meeting leader) doubts began to creep in that I would not be able to lose my super-duper goal of 87 pounds. I began to wonder if I could just lose 25, my 10% goal, and how long that would take. I had a secret goal of hitting the 30 pound mark by the end of the year.

So, imagine my surprise, I lost 2.2 pounds. A full kilogram! I even got below the 240 mark and had to lose another daily point. I am down to 31 daily points now. So my total lost is a whopping 18 pounds. Only 7 more to go to reach my 10%!

Back to my WTF! I had the worst week on plan ever, ate like total crap and I still lost more than the weeks I was doing so well!?!?!?!? On Wednesday and Thursday, I admit I did eat better, much more veggies and water. And, on Thursday, I didn't eat or drink too much. I had 20 points left after weigh-in.

The meeting helped a lot. I took away a new knowledge of metabolism and why it is so important to exercise and get your heart rate up. I still hate exercise. And, I admitted to the group that I am having doubts for the first time since I started. I took away 3 key points that really helped.

1. It wasn't really a mistake if you learned a lesson from it. - The lesson I learned is that I cannot be around that much candy. If I want candy (which I can't have for a year because of I promise I made to a certain deity that if John's bond levy passed, then I wouldn't touch the stuff for a year), I can't have unlimited supplies of in the house. This goes for all things that I have aforementioned are my evil foods. I also can't buy any of those WW 1 point cakes. I bought a box and ate the entire box in one night. 12 points - grr.

2. (My favorite) A bad day on plan is still better than a good day eating like you used to. So true, at least I accounted for all my points and still tried to stay with it.

3. Forgive yourself - You had a bad day, forgive yourself, learn your lesson, get back on plan. Don't let a moment or 2 (or a dozen) of weakness stray you from your path.

So, here is my dilemma. I had 1 week where I was an average of 5 points under plan every day and I lost 1.6 pounds. The next week I ate all my points, and touched about 10 or so weekly points and I lost 1 pound. This week I eat all my points and have 7 points left over, and I lose 2.2 pounds. What should I do? Should I try to eat all my points and weekly points and see where it takes me? Should I go back to just eating my dailys? I dunno.

Well, it is late, I have to be up early and be on the road at 5:30. I am headed to bed.

PS - By the way, I ate really well today, made good choices even though hubs and I went out to eat and cooked crab fettuccine Alfredo for dinner. I am a little over for the day, but it was well worth it because I feel better than I have in a while.